The Tongue & the Heart

Written By Nicole Vollrath

RLC Home Group Handout | April 26th, 2026 

“Grace that Works - The Tongue & the Heart”  | James 3:1-12

Recap

In this section of scripture, James is making the statement that our words carry tremendous power, and our ability to control them is an important indicator of spiritual maturity. Most people can think of statements they’ve heard, whether positive or negative, that have stuck with them for years. Some of those statements may have even changed the direction of their lives, or impacted the way they function in different relationships. This week we were challenged to examine our own hearts and the ways that we interact with the people around us, both in person and online. The gospel doesn’t just call for us to change, it promises transformation. If our words can challenge, wound, encourage, or lead, it is important that we allow God to change us from the source. 

References 

  • Matthew 5:21-22 - Sermon on the Mount—we will be held accountable for what we say. 

  • Matthew 12 - People will be held accountable for every careless word spoken.

  • Proverbs 18:21 – Death and life are in the power of the tongue. 

  • Matthew 15:11 - What comes out of the mouth defiles a person. 

  • Luke 6:45 – ”... for his mouth speaks from the overflow of the heart”

Discussion Questions

Head

  • Is there anything that stood out or spoke to you in this week’s sermon?

  • Do you think that negative or positive statements tend to stick with people longer?

  • Why do you think control of the tongue is an indicator of spiritual maturity? 

Heart

  • What is a statement (either positive or negative) that has played on repeat in your own heart and mind?

  • Who or what “holds the reins” or controls the “rudder” when your speech feels out of your own control? Are there specific situations where you struggle more frequently with this?    

  • We talked about how we hold the precious resource of “words of encouragement,”  but we have to choose to give that resource away to other people. What causes you not to encourage the people around you? What causes you to say things that are actually discouraging? 

Hands

  • How can you speak back against a negative, repetitive statement that has stuck with you over the years?

  • Is there anyone that you may have spoken to in a way that requires repentance?

  • How do we look for opportunities to affirm and encourage the people around us without offering cheap or inauthentic praise?

  • What does it look like for you, in your workplace, home, etc. to use the power of your words to encourage and direct people around you? 

Nicole Vollrath
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